I was listening to a summit on Living on Purpose. Whenever I sign up for these online learning sessions, it amazes me and I am left in awe of the speakers. It’s like they have it all figured out. They’re so full of wisdom and they’ve got it. Whatever the “it” is, they’ve grabbed it and have made it their own.
Then the awe fades a little jealousy starts… comparisons starts… judgement starts… and I’m left feeling bad, when I should be feeling great. What can I say? It’s exhausting being me. LOL!
Today, what all the speakers seem to be saying is that it’s okay to feel all the feels. In fact acknowledge the feelings and be aware of its presence. But, and this is a big BUT, do not give it a story. Do not feed into it. Because when there’s no story behind the feeling, there’s no judgement and there’s no getting stuck. One of the speakers said that feelings are only energy and it’s how we react to it that gives the feeling – life. But if we simply let the energy flow through us, it’ll also flow out of us — and not in a bad way, but more like a river running its course. It’s moving and doing what it’s meant to do. Feelings do the same for us. We feel because the Universe/Source/God is wanting to bring our awareness to something that needs acknowledging. In my case, the awareness means I also need to do the work.
In this journey that I’ve started, I’m having to reassess a lot of things in my life and understand how I’ve come to this point. I have a good life, but I’m painfully aware that I have a lot of self-limiting beliefs which lead to self-sabotage. Why? I don’t know yet. That’s the part of me that I have to discover and understand. That’s where the work comes in, but if in the meantime, I can practice self-awareness and learn to let go and forgive whatever it is that is bothering me at the moment, then maybe I can make true, committed progress on this journey.
I’m ready to step into the next phase of my life, but until I can cut the cords to those invisible anchors, I won’t be able to move on.
I have this feeling that time is ticking away. I don’t feel like I’m going to die tomorrow or anything like that, but it’s just this sense of I have things to do – NOW. Midlife crisis? I don’t know. LOL! But the positive aspect of it is that it’s pushing me towards change and I want to honor that. Whether the push is divine guidance or my own neurosis; right now it doesn’t matter. All I know is that I need to move and I need to work. That’s my acknowledgement. No judgement. My path is like no others’ and I can’t compare. I shouldn’t compare.
To compare would be to minimize not only my experience, but the other person I’m comparing myself to. Each path is rugged and beautiful with its own twists and challenges. Because what I’m also realizing is that no path is smooth and easy. Because for every person who has done the work and stepped into their path and had the courage to keep moving forward are warriors. And warriors are honed through their practice, discipline, and experiences. The end result of what we see may be the shining armor and gleaming confidence, but all that light had to work through a lot of darkness to radiate.
Right now, I’m hearing my mom’s voice in the back of my head. She’s a warrior and someone I want to emulate. She’s saying, “You have your time and it will come. It’s different for everyone, but once it comes, you’ll know.”
Shine on my warrior friends. Give awareness and acknowledgement to whatever it is you are going through right now. BUT, set it free and keep marching forward.
Featured image by: Photo by William Zhang on Unsplash
Post image by: Photo by Xuan Nguyen on Unsplash
